I've found myself in a strange mood today. I don't know if it is actually to be considered a mood actually, maybe I have just found myself wanting something so badly it hurts my heart that I don't have it. either way I just really want to be madly in love, some place quite with the man of my dreams holding me, just content to sit in the silence with each other. to not have to fill the space around us with words because it is already full with something words can't begin to describe.
I want to find the guy who can pull out the romantic, eloquent words when the moment arises, who will have a snappy come back for everything, and a joke for every occasion but who can also be content just sitting with me. who can be happy sitting with a cup of hot chocolate having the only conversation come from the way we look at each other.
that is all.
taylor.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Saturday, July 30, 2011
I don't really have anything to say but I feel like I have majorly failed at my blog this summer and need to fix that so I am going back to posting every day. or at least trying to. I don't know how well this will work when school starts again but that is okay.
Today I found out that my friend Jesse doesn't hate me. I thought he did and it made me really sad, like crying type of sad. I though he hated me because we were best friends one day and then he stopped answering my phone calls and didn't say hi to me in the halls at school, in fact he went the opposite direction in the halls at school, and I don't know about you guys but I thought that meant he didn't want to talk to me any more. And it wasn't exactly random. He was dating one of my best friends and he stopped talking to me when she broke up with him. I figured he was mad at her and saw us as a sort of package deal so he was mad at me too and we couldn't be friends.
Well, I felt bad about how that break up went because Jesse is a good person, and an amazing friend, and he deserves so much better than what happened. I knew he was upset and so I figured he was just upset at first and would come talk to me when he was less hurt. Well, it has been a year now and he never did so I came to the conclusion that he wasn't coming back to being my best friend and I settled for facebook stalking to keep up with his life and wishing I could talk to him about everything or anything.
Now I bet you are all thinking, "so what happened to make you realise he doesn't hate you?" and I'll tell you what. Faith and I were talking and she mentioned that about once a week Jesse would send her a message on facebook asking her how I was but she never responded because she didn't know if she should. So not only does Jesse not hate me, he actually still cares about me. All of this time he has been doing the same thing I have been doing and we could have been friends but he worried that since my friend broke up with him I had too.
that is all.
taylor.
Today I found out that my friend Jesse doesn't hate me. I thought he did and it made me really sad, like crying type of sad. I though he hated me because we were best friends one day and then he stopped answering my phone calls and didn't say hi to me in the halls at school, in fact he went the opposite direction in the halls at school, and I don't know about you guys but I thought that meant he didn't want to talk to me any more. And it wasn't exactly random. He was dating one of my best friends and he stopped talking to me when she broke up with him. I figured he was mad at her and saw us as a sort of package deal so he was mad at me too and we couldn't be friends.
Well, I felt bad about how that break up went because Jesse is a good person, and an amazing friend, and he deserves so much better than what happened. I knew he was upset and so I figured he was just upset at first and would come talk to me when he was less hurt. Well, it has been a year now and he never did so I came to the conclusion that he wasn't coming back to being my best friend and I settled for facebook stalking to keep up with his life and wishing I could talk to him about everything or anything.
Now I bet you are all thinking, "so what happened to make you realise he doesn't hate you?" and I'll tell you what. Faith and I were talking and she mentioned that about once a week Jesse would send her a message on facebook asking her how I was but she never responded because she didn't know if she should. So not only does Jesse not hate me, he actually still cares about me. All of this time he has been doing the same thing I have been doing and we could have been friends but he worried that since my friend broke up with him I had too.
that is all.
taylor.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Guys, I am with Cini right now! Isn't that the coolest ever? Yes, yes it is. We went to camp last week and I could go on for hours about how much fun that was but that would bore even the most die hard fan to the point of sleep because you were not there and you do not know those people or places or anything that I would mention in said stories so you don't really care even if you love me to death.
Something you might care about, or at least that I thought was cool and figured I might as well tell you, is that I pet a goose today. Yep, you read that correctly. I was in a park with Cini and her sister Jill and we walked to a lake. At this lake, we feed geese. And these geese were so cool that they came and ate out of your hand. One of them in particular came and rubbed its head on my leg like a dog. And so I pet it. And then I thought of all the germs on it and went home to shower. But I pet it.
that is all.
taylor.
Something you might care about, or at least that I thought was cool and figured I might as well tell you, is that I pet a goose today. Yep, you read that correctly. I was in a park with Cini and her sister Jill and we walked to a lake. At this lake, we feed geese. And these geese were so cool that they came and ate out of your hand. One of them in particular came and rubbed its head on my leg like a dog. And so I pet it. And then I thought of all the germs on it and went home to shower. But I pet it.
that is all.
taylor.
Sunday, July 3, 2011
hello world. do you know how excited I am for next week to happen? So over the moon excited that I might explode. That excited. I cannot wait to see Celina! Only 8 more days! That is crazy! I stopped counting for a while because it felt like such a long time to say "only 48 more days" and then last night I realised how close it was! I am so excited to play with her.
We are going to go to girls camp and I am going to get to hear her share her testimony, which always reminds me why I believe what I do. We are going to play Disney Monopoly, I will finally be able to correct the fact that she won the last round last visit and be the reining champion once again. We are going to walk to the grocery store and buy french bread and ice cream, our silly traditions are my favorite. We are going to eat cough drops like candy. We are going to play a game of Uno and 3:49 in the morning, only turning on her book light. We are going to tell each other secrets. I am finally going to be able to put faces to the people in her stories. She is going to see my red hair. It is going to be a trip to remember.
The one and only negative thing I can think of is that I am SUPER nervous to fly by my self. I have only been on an airplane once and I hated it. I got sick and we missed our flight and my mother had a panic attack and we got lost in Chicago. It wasn't good. I must really love Cini if I am willing to fly again. I much prefer driving. I am super worried that I am going to miss my flight and be stuck some where, alone, for who knows how long. Or the plane with crash and I will die. Or I will have to sit next to a creeper. Or, or, or.
that is all.
taylor.
We are going to go to girls camp and I am going to get to hear her share her testimony, which always reminds me why I believe what I do. We are going to play Disney Monopoly, I will finally be able to correct the fact that she won the last round last visit and be the reining champion once again. We are going to walk to the grocery store and buy french bread and ice cream, our silly traditions are my favorite. We are going to eat cough drops like candy. We are going to play a game of Uno and 3:49 in the morning, only turning on her book light. We are going to tell each other secrets. I am finally going to be able to put faces to the people in her stories. She is going to see my red hair. It is going to be a trip to remember.
The one and only negative thing I can think of is that I am SUPER nervous to fly by my self. I have only been on an airplane once and I hated it. I got sick and we missed our flight and my mother had a panic attack and we got lost in Chicago. It wasn't good. I must really love Cini if I am willing to fly again. I much prefer driving. I am super worried that I am going to miss my flight and be stuck some where, alone, for who knows how long. Or the plane with crash and I will die. Or I will have to sit next to a creeper. Or, or, or.
that is all.
taylor.
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