High school oh High school

Well it is official, I have started high school. And you know what, for all the build up I gave it, it isn't that much different then jr. high. Only it is better. I love my new school and the freedoms I am already feeling. I feel a thousand times more trusted then I was in jr. high. It is like they finally realized that we weren't babies and are treating us like it. The work is challenging and I am actually learning things, the teachers are nice, and the people . . . oh the people. I have not made to many new friends but I love the variety of people at my school. I have already formed the habit of sitting there and watching people. They have already revived me and helped me to start writing again, really writing like I haven't for almost a year. I feel as though this will be a good change, one that will change every thing, for ever, and for the better.

rain

I am not really sure if I have anything to say but the thunder and rain have been going constantly for hours and even though I have been in the basement until a few minutes ago, they have been keeping me awake so I thought I would tell you of my adventure in the rain this afternoon. I was friends with the rain then because: A) I was not trying to sleep, B) it was warm and sunny but also pouring rain C) I got to leave the chair that was holding me hostage for a hair cut and dance in it with some neighbors. It was great fun being soaking wet with my sister, Faith, and some great friends. This weather has been crazy, 110 degrees one day and storming the next, and holy cow did we have a great sun set the other night! In one direction the sky was green and cloudy, turn 90 degrees and you've got hot pink and the brightest blue I've ever seen, turn again and you've got a pale, but equally stunning, blue with orange and red clouds. And the final turn shifted to a purple-gray color. It was enchanting.

titles

I hate titling things. I mean you have no way to win. You either have to wait until you finish writing something and then you are left with the daunting task of compressing your newly finished masterpiece into a few words.
OR
You could title it before you finish, saving you from one horror only to give yourself another. If you start with a title it's like you've limited your self, tied yourself down to that title and you spend so much time trying to keep the story with in itself that you lose some of the original grandeur of the idea.

That is why I am now left with a novel that I have been working on for three years now sitting open on my desktop saved as "The Hilary, Tristan, and Colbey story, To be named." I have been struggling with those three words, 'to be named', through out the whole writing process, waiting I suppose for the perfect title to jump into existence. Alas, it hasn't and the elusive title has left me a nearly finished novel that I am quite proud of and headache from trying to give it a name.

This must be how mothers feel. She spends nine months with swollen ankles, a weird appetite, and a stomach the size of a beach ball and when it is all over she has to give a name to the accumulative result of those nine months of constant worry, work, and wonder. A name that will be people's first impression of this beautiful thing that she created. A name that will define that new masterpiece. A name that will, in essence, be what that child is. How do mothers do it? How do they always know who you are before they even see you, to the point that they feel confidant in the name they give you?

Do you see my problem, because it's a big one? Here I have this beautiful masterpiece that I made out of nothing and I still, at the end of three years constant thought, have no idea of what exactly it is.

writing quotes that I love

Writing became such a process of discovery that I couldn't wait to get to work in the morning: I wanted to know what I was going to say. ~Sharon O'Brien

I try to leave out that parts that people skip ~Elmore Leonard

If there is a book you really want to read, but has been written yet, you must write it. ~ Unknown

The pages are still blank, but there is a miraculous feeling of the words being there, written in invisible ink and clamoring to become visible. ~Vladimir Nabakov

Be yourself. Above all, let who you are, what you are, what you believe, shine through every sentence you write, every piece you finish. ~John Jakes
Writing is am exploration. You start from nothing and learn as you go. ~E.L. Doctorow

Writing is a form of personal freedom. It frees us from the mass identity we see in the making all around us. In the end, writers will write not to be outlaw heroes of some underculture but mainly to save them selves, to survive as individuals. Don Delillo

why I write

I love writing. I love that you start out with nothing of importance, a piece of paper and a pen, and in the end you have something beautiful. Something that is unique and special, that can touch people and change lives. I love how the words flow out of me like silk and turn my thoughts into something real and tangible. I love the feeling of accomplishment when you finish something you've been working on for what feels like forever. I love all of the worlds it opens up to me. When I write I don't have to be me, a normal, every-day, little girl who hasn't done anything really important (yet) from a town no one has ever heard of. When I write there are no limits or regulations, no expectations, and nothing to hold me back. I can be any one and any where I want to be. I love the power it gives me. The power to shape and change lives, even if they are only pretend lives. I love the escape it gives me. I love all the raw possibilities you have when you stat with a blank page that is just waiting for you to fill it.

I'm sick of being sick

well this is me, sitting at home, at 10 o'clock, on a Thursday, throwing up and covered in an over all feeling of gross sickly-ness, as I am starting to think is normal. It is not normal, at all. At least not for most people. I guess I am just special. Oh well.

St. George

So this week me and my family drove down to St. George to surprise Kelsie for her birthday. When we knocked on the door she was so shocked that she didn't even recognize us for a minute, but when she did she tackled all 5 of us to the ground. We went inside and she had 3 little kids sitting in the living room, for a minute I was worried that she had kidnapped them but then she told us that they were the neighbor kids and she had paid them to come over and play with her because she was lonely. Poor Kelsie. They left, and we all got caught up and went to dinner. Kelsie got Fettuccine Alfredo and I got a hamburge and we split them and I was so glad that she would still do that with me even though she is all grown up and pretending to be mature.
Saturday morning we went to se How to Train your Dragon and I decided that I love it because the dragon reminds me of my doggie. When we got back from the movies we walked down to the park and attempted to play volleyball but we gave up after a while because we realized that we are all very bad at volleyball. That night we went to see Grandma and Grandpa and we didn't fight so it was ok, then the next morning we went and saw Sarah and the kids, Jack Jack and Nick were both at their grandma's house and I missed seeing them so I am glad that we will be back for spring break!
I love going to St. George! (especially because it is warm!)

last wek wins

Last week I was sick Wednesday-Saturday and it was still the best week of my life! Monday Me and mom went and got my permit! Finally! And I have officially started to drive, you may want to stay off the roads!
But that is nothing compared to Tuesday morning!
Mom, Dad, Kelsie, Gracen, and Me all went to the temple and did baptisms for my grandma Sherly, Great grandma Shannon, and Great great grandma. It was amazing, and one morning that I will not be forgetting ever! I am so grateful that I am a member of the church and can do that for my family!

Epic

There was question on the word epic and as I attempted to answer said question I ended up writing a comment that was epic, but was nearly as long as the post I was commenting on so I decided that epic was an epic enough word to get it's own post!
The dictionary.com definition of the word epic is as follows: heroic; majestic; impressively great; unusually of great size or extent.
I disapprove of this definition. While it is true that the word epic defies all definition I believe they should have tried harder to fit this word into a 5 to 6 word sentence that basically sums up this wonderful word because that is an epic fail.
Epic is 'heroic, majestic, impressively great, and usually of great size or extent' but it is also much more then that. Epic is a way of being. To be truly epic you must be amazing, superb, lacking in nothing except for a down side, and in all other ways wonderfully, astonishingly, perfect.
EPIC people: Me (of course), every one I associate with, a few other people!
EPIC things: the weekend, Popsicles, days off of school, summer, the first snow of the year, a few other things!
EPIC places: St. George, that place which you call home, the place you feel safe, any where you are loved and love being, a few other places!
Taylor Lapp's definition of the word EPIC: anything, and everything that you deem to be perfectly enjoyable in every way. I hope that clears up any confusion on the word EPIC! ! !

Wally-world-third-person-sprekening(speaking for those none germen understanding types)-new-moon-watching-epicness

Well, obviously I had a good week end and I am assuming you all did also because if I assume you have had a bad weekend then you would be sad and that would be lame. Heather came home with me and we hung out with my familia making quilts and then went to walmart and bought a fabulous dinner of frozen pizza, potato chips, Mountain Dew, and skittles, then we found our friend Emma and she came home with us and ate food with us and we had fun just being us, because us is epic. Then after a while Emma had to leave and me and Heather started writing because we are writing a book together, right now it is called Anything But Perfect and is completely wonderful. It is about this boy, Forrest Evergreen, and this girl, Meghin Smith, who fall in love and they are both just the coolest peoples we ever did create.
Well obviously writing takes a lot of brain juice and finger stretching because after we were thoroughly worn out at around 1 in the morning I said that my fingers hurt for an excuse to stop typing and some how this got us to thinking about how it would turn out if all the charactors of all the books that the two of us were writing (both together and separately) and ended up talking for them for about 3 hours and because we were saying things such as 'Tristan is offended," or "Nathan says that is stupid," we ended up talking in the third person and it made us laugh and then we realized we sounded crazy and went to sleep.
Then my padre had to wake me up and ask me to clean out the fridge and freezer. SO I was and then I was putting away the groceries that he brought home and I dropped a can of corn on my big toe and it hurts reallllllllllyyyyyyyyy bad and my toe nail is the color of blue froot loops, which I am guessing is not a good thing.
Well because my toe hurt so bad we decided to go to the dollar theater to watch new moon with Emma and Cody (my toe isn't really why we went it had been the plan all along) so we ran to wal-mart in the snow (we is heather and I) and bought a bunch of candy and Cody's dad came and drove us to the theater. It was really fun mocking Edward and the cheesy-ness of it all while at the same time loveing Taylor Lautner's abs and teasing Heather and Cody because both of them like each other and both of them know it but they won't admit it because they don't want their friendship getting weird so they both decided not to admit they like each other untill they are sixteen, which is good but they would be such a cute couple and I am so excited for them to just admit that they love each other! Well when the movie was over we were waiting for Cody's dad to come get us and they all attempted to teach me how to be gangsta but I fail epically at being gangster so we gave up on that and then we went home and I hung out with my sisters, it was all pretty epic.
and that is my weekend of wally-world-third-person-sprekening (speaking)-new-moon-watching-epic-ness in case all of you were wondering!

ello!

ello,
it is the time of night that I get very tired and i was about to go to bed but then I heard the word blog on the television and was like, "Hey I have a blog! When was the last time I posted something? OH, I should fix that!" Well now that I have told you what I said to my self I will give you my opinion of valintines day
I think it will be swonderful when I have a boy who loves me and takes me out to dinner and buys me flowers and all that but until then I think I will tell every one that I think it is a made up holiday created by the candy and card indistries meant to make money and crush people when the love of their lives forgets it. Really, I don't get why people need a special day to tell someone they love them, if you love them you should tell them every day not just once a year! Gosh. Well I am tired and that tends to make me more judgemental of things.
night