I do enjoy writing. and apparently I'm crazy also.

I do sometimes sound very crazy. I say things like "we like this" and "we must have hear you wrong." when it should just be "I did this" and "I must have heard you wrong." and when i say those things people look at me like I'm crazy. which, you know, if understandable. except the voices in my head are my characters, and so I don't feel like that makes me crazy.

it probably does.

any way. . .

i do most of my writing in my head. i would much rather sit and think about the chapter for a week or two or maybe even a month or two before trying to write it than to sit down and just go with it. i like to think about it, plot it out, decide who says what when, and get it all perfect in my head a few dozen times before i ever put a word down on paper and then once i put my fingers to my keyboard i can pull all of that out of my head in a few hours and get a very nice chapter.

i've been in that thinking stage for the rewrite of the first chapter of marks for about a month now. okay, more like two months but that is okay. and you know what? i am still not ready to put the words down. i haven't had enough time to really thing. i haven't had any time where i can turn off the lights and close my eyes and listen while my characters run dialog. i haven't had enough time to go take a walk and let the logistics fall into place with the beat of my feet. i haven't had time to sit in my car and watch every move they make and every expression that crosses their faces.

my brain has been distracted by thoughts of edgar allen poe and systems of equations and sisters and sickness and holidays. and my time had been taken up by homework and clothes and naps and cookies and new cds and over all things that are good in nature but very bad for me in the way that they take up my brain space. i really need to get caught up on sleep and homework and then take christmas break (which is not nearly close enough) to do things like go running in the cold and driving in the dark and thinking and plotting and dialog-running.

that is all.
taylor.